Definition: The act of physically lowering yourself to speak to someone as if they’re a confused pug, often paired with exaggerated enunciation. Common among tall educators or retail staff weaponizing height privilege to imply intellectual superiority. Victims may retaliate with mirror crouching or asking if the condescender needs a step stool for their ego.
Example: My dentist did the full vertical condescension routine when explaining flossing—knees bent, hands on thighs, the works.
I countered by sitting on the floor and asking if she wanted juice boxes for the team.