Definition: The delusional performance where a couple insists on being surgically attached 24/7, claiming it’s “romantic dedication” when it’s actually emotional suffocation disguised as intimacy. They finish each other’s sentences only because they’ve smothered all individual thought, and view friendships outside the duo as treasonous acts. This cling-wrap dynamic often involves phrases like “We’re soulmates, we don’t need others” while secretly resenting any bathroom breaks taken alone. The relationship becomes a two-person echo chamber where personal growth goes to die.
Example: “Sarah canceled her sister’s bridesmaid request because of velcro ventriloquism – her boyfriend said weddings are ‘our time, not family time.’ Now they just binge-watch Netflix while texting each other from adjacent rooms ‘to stay connected.'”