Golf Brain

Definition: When someone raised in extreme wealth displays a total inability to grasp basic financial constraints or common struggles, often while imposing bougie activities as bonding rituals. Like assuming a minimum-wage partner can casually join a country club outing or “network” over polo.

Their brain short-circuits when confronted with real-world limitations, unironically suggesting solutions like “Just sell your grandpa’s watch!” or “Tell your dad’s accountant to handle it.” Named after rich dads who think golf solves poverty-induced stress. Pure economic obliviousness, wrapped in argyle.

Example:

When Jenna complained about rent stress, her friend Chloe breezily suggested a weekend ski trip to decompress, utterly baffled by Jenna’s panic.

Faced with the community center’s budget plea, the trustee earnestly proposed a high-ticket art auction fundraiser, blind to the neighborhood’s actual poverty.

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