Definition: That surreal state of permanent digital detox where your first instinct is to reboot the router, only to realize your job, news, and memes have vanished. Society collapses, but your inbox stays blissfully empty and the pressure to post…
Definition: That frantic, knee-jerk ritual of unplugging your router during an internet apocalypse, praying for a miracle while low-key knowing the digital rapture has claimed Wi-Fi forever. It’s denial dressed as tech support—a last-ditch hail mary before doom sinks in.…
Definition: When a parent is physically and mentally dialed into their kid’s world—listening to Minecraft lore like it’s critical intel, actually examining scribbled art for two full minutes, or grilling them on “who you were kind to today” instead of…
Definition: That sacred moment when a parent fully suspends their adult-world bullshit to absorb their kid’s universe. Not just nodding along, but actively diving into Minecraft build details or pretending your kid’s macaroni art belongs in MoMA. You know it…
Definition: The physical manifestation of wealth insulation where golf carts double as reality-proof bubbles. Here, trust fund kids learn that “earning it” means choosing which yacht to summer on, while staff polish silverware for guests who unironically suggest student loans…
Definition: When someone raised in extreme wealth displays a total inability to grasp basic financial constraints or common struggles, often while imposing bougie activities as bonding rituals. Like assuming a minimum-wage partner can casually join a country club outing or…
Definition: The psychological minefield where soldiers find themselves pointing weapons at fellow citizens during civil unrest. This isn’t enemy territory but familiar streets, facing neighbors exercising rights the military swore to defend. Every protest sign and shout echoes the oath…
Definition: The moment a soldier’s sense of duty violently fractures when ordered to deploy against fellow citizens. It’s the visceral internal shattering caused by the cognitive dissonance of protecting the Constitution while potentially suppressing the very rights it guarantees. This…
Definition: That spontaneous combustion of lust between two people who absolutely shouldn’t be hooking up—defying logic, timing, or social norms. Think a stern Red Cross volunteer whisking you home post-war, or a “let’s take it slow” date suddenly tearing off…
Definition: That wildly unexpected, often spontaneous, sexual encounter that violently derails your perfectly ordinary day or life trajectory. It hits like a cosmic plot twist when you’re just fetching coffee, waiting for a bus, or politely walking a dog, leaving…