Definition: The chaotic but noble coordinator of a mobile pack of therapy dogs, specifically tasked with bringing slobbery joy to stressed humans in places like hospitals. This role involves equal parts logistics wrangler, drool management expert, and heart-melting facilitator, navigating…
Definition: The phenomenon of becoming inexplicably rich by forgetting about Bitcoin you bought as a joke in 2013 and rediscovering it after it moons. Involves zero skill, research, or effort—just blind, dumb luck. Victims often develop a sudden Messiah complex,…
Definition: A person who accidentally became a millionaire by being born into wealth they neither earned nor appreciate. They often adopt a faux-bohemian lifestyle funded entirely by their trust fund, complaining about “the grind” while sipping $18 cold brews. Their…
Definition: Hancock Swerve That moment a story violently U-turns from a compelling premise into baffling nonsense halfway through, like a superhero drama morphing into an alien soulmate conspiracy. It’s a 136-degree plot detour
Definition: Funeral Montage When a film climaxes with a tacky, overstuffed parade of every character ever mentioned—dead or fictional—appearing out of thin air to “honor” a moment, completely obliterating any emotional weight. It’s like the director panicked and threw confetti…
Definition: The critical financial safety net that allows someone to navigate setbacks (job loss, medical bills, car explosions) without experiencing catastrophic freefall into destitution. It’s not about funding luxury ski trips; it’s about having enough reserves to ensure a flat…
Definition: The undeniable ability of sufficient wealth to prevent or drastically reduce common, soul-crushing sources of unhappiness like eviction notices, predatory debt, or choosing between insulin and groceries. It doesn’t manufacture joy out of thin air, but it expertly dismantles…
Definition: The specific income level where additional money stops noticeably increasing your happiness because all your survival needs, security concerns, and basic leisure desires are fully covered. Beyond this point, stacking cash feels like trying to inflate a balloon that’s…
Definition: A driver who claims the left lane as their personal fiefdom, cruising exactly at (or 0.5mph above) the speed limit while oblivious to the growing convoy of rage behind them. They fancy themselves the “pace car” of public roads,…
Definition: The baffling act of hitting your brakes first and only flicking on your turn signal after you’ve already committed to stopping, as if the signal is an apology rather than a warning. It turns following drivers into mind-readers who…