Definition: A person hopelessly enslaved to nasal spray, whose sinuses rebel with apocalyptic congestion the moment the bottle leaves their clawed grip. They develop a terrifying tolerance, spraying industrial quantities up each nostril just to achieve five minutes of sweet, sweet airflow, only to plunge deeper into the vicious cycle of rebound swelling. You’ll find them hoarding bottles in every coat pocket, desk drawer, and car cup holder like a dragon guarding decongestant gold.
Example: Sarah became a full-blown Afrin Gremlin after that sinus infection—now she sneaks off to bathroom stalls for emergency sprays during meetings. Her nostrils probably look like two dried apricots in a desert.