Definition: The modern dating equivalent of “the dog ate my homework” – a chronically recycled, paper-thin excuse for ghosting, flakiness, or inconsistent communication. Used to feign helplessness while signaling disinterest without direct confrontation.
If someone’s “phone died” more than once during crucial moments (like confirming dates or responding for days), it’s not a tech issue—it’s a them issue. It means you’ve been downgraded to low-priority backup battery status. Believe the dead battery, not the eventual half-hearted “Oops!” text.
Example: When Jake vanished for three days before our date, only to text “sorry, phone died lol”, the dead battery excuse confirmed his disinterest.
She pulled the dead battery excuse twice last week, mysteriously offline whenever plans needed finalizing, a clear sign I was on low-priority backup.