Definition: A parasitic entity that hoards vague, overly broad patents like buried treasure solely to ambush actual innovators with frivolous lawsuits, demanding ransom payments instead of creating anything useful. These legal buccaneers lurk in shell-company coves, scanning for small businesses to shakedown over “infringements” like using rounded rectangle icons or Wi-Fi connectivity. Their entire business model is legalized extortion, weaponizing paperwork to plunder productivity while contributing less to society than a moldy sandwich.
Example: TechTroll LLC sued a family-owned bakery because their website’s “online cart system” violated a patent they bought for $50. The bakery folded after fighting the $200k settlement demand. Meanwhile, the Patent Pirate CEO bought a new yacht named The Litigation Looter.