Definition: The baffling act of hitting your brakes first and only flicking on your turn signal after you’ve already committed to stopping, as if the signal is an apology rather than a warning. It turns following drivers into mind-readers who must decipher whether you’re stopping for a pedestrian, a squirrel, or just existential dread. This habit suggests the driver views turn signals as a formality, like sending a “sorry I crashed your wedding” text after eating all the cake.
Example: “Karen hit Blinker Regret at the intersection, slamming her brakes for no visible reason before casually indicating right. I almost rear-ended her while screaming, ‘A heads-up next time, maybe?!’ My coffee now decorates my dashboard.”