Definition: The artful burial of soul-crushing concessions within walls of indecipherable legalese, designed to be skipped like a stone across a pond. You skim, click “agree,” and trade your firstborn’s selfies for imaginary convenience. Suddenly, your vacation video hawks VPNs…
Definition: A fleecie is getting subtly scammed by believing in “free” perks—like hotel breakfasts or shipping—that are actually baked into inflated prices. Corporations grin while you pay extra for nothing. Examples: service fees on self-printed tickets, TOS agreements that swipe…
Definition: A misguided remedy enthusiastically promoted despite being scientifically useless and potentially harmful. Originated from protest advice to use dairy milk against tear gas, despite experts confirming it worsens eye irritation and ignores lactose allergies. Now symbolizes any well-intentioned but…
Definition: The unexpected flood of first-time or long-retired protesters—especially seniors, post-op recoverers, or chronically ill folks—into mass demonstrations, turning sidewalks into a shuffle of walkers, wheelchairs, and determined grandpas. Named for both their hair and the sudden, metallic glint of…
Definition: The non-monetary cost of earning a paycheck, measured in sacrificed well-being, eroded relationships, or abandoned passions. It’s the toll extracted when your job consumes your identity, sanity, or ethics just to afford rent and ramen. This invisible debt manifests…
Definition: When someone habitually sacrifices their own well-being to appease others, performing elaborate acts of emotional labor until they’re metaphorically reduced to ashes. Often disguised as virtue signaling, these martyrs confuse self-destruction with nobility while their “takers” toast marshmallows over…
Definition: An offhand comment—like “you can just be you” or “who wouldn’t like you?”—that strikes with startling emotional voltage, cracking open hidden grief, self-doubt, or loneliness. It’s never a rehearsed speech, just a casual truth tossed your way when you’re…
Definition: That seismic moment when someone’s unexpectedly tender or validating words hit you with tectonic force, cracking open emotional fault lines you didn’t know existed. It’s not grand gestures, but quiet truths—like your partner naming your quiet strength or a…
Definition: The fragile illusion of trust vaporized when your therapist morphs into a boundary-stomping liability. It’s that gut-punch moment you realize the paid professional safeguarding your psyche is actually gossiping with your mom, hitting on you, or moonlighting as an…
Definition: When your therapist hijacks the session to serve their own agenda instead of yours. They might drone on about 70s rock bands, spill your secrets to their bar buddies, or obsess over pseudoscience like the Enneagram—labeling you as “such…